Navigating the Wild World of Motherhood
It’s been a busy weekend in the world of entertainment. Charlie Sheen’s insane ramblings and “duh, winning” continues to be among the most talked about topics, but I’m going to tackle a few other goodies instead. Danica Patrick, Jeff Gordon, Carl Edwards and Miley Cyrus. Odd combo? Yes, but I have my reasons. (See video at the end of this blog post if you must skip ahead for a laugh.)
Danica Dominates in Vegas
Things got interesting at Las Vegas Motor Speedway this weekend as Danica Patrick snagged her best finish EVER in the Nationwide race on Saturday, coming in 4th. A top five finish proves she’s in NASCAR because she’s a talented driver, not just because she’s a pretty face and a hot body that makes a gazillion dollars for her sponsors. (Yes, I’m talking to you, GoDaddy.) I’m so excited for Danica and I hope this will shush the naysayers, at least for a while.
Daddies Dominate in Vegas too…
Jeff Gordon raced to victory last week and Carl Edwards just snagged his first victory today in Vegas. Both drivers finally ended some rather lengthy losing streaks. I think this proves that just because you have sweet, innocent, adorable babies crawling, drooling at popping on your at home, doesn’t mean you’re a big old softy on the track. Last year, I asked Carl Edwards about whether or not fatherhood had changed him as a driver. He told me the answer was yes and no, which makes sense. He added that he was annoyed at people who think that would make him less of a driver. I think these two wins prove that diaper duty actually makes them better drivers.
Miley Cyrus on SNL Spells Redemption
If you didn’t catch Saturday Night Live last night, you missed a rather hilarious episode. Miley Cyrus was the guest hostess and I have to say, she was very cool about spoofing herself. I’m not a Miley fan, but I did respect her good sense of humor about… well, herself. SNL does a skit about Miley Cyrus having her own talk show and they totally rag on her. Miley was on that skit last night impersonating Justin Bieber. I thought it was super. Not that’s she’s laugh out loud funny, but it was definitely entertaining. Notice the way they spoof her dad… love that mullet!!!
Images: Nascar.com & Hulu.com
If you can’t afford an electric cigarette-smoking psychic like Camille, you read horoscopes. I happen to think zodiac signs can be pretty accurate as far as insight into someone’s personality. For example, I tend to gravitate towards Sagittarius men and Aquarius females like myself. Now, thanks to the millennia-long effect of the moon’s gravitational pull on the Earth, everything’s being thrown into a cosmic blender on “Power Burst” speed. I don’t know who to like anymore…
Today, FoxNews reported Parke Kunkle, board member of the Minnesota Planetarium Society said, “When [astrologers] say that the sun is in Pisces, it’s really not in Pisces.” Why? Because over the last 1,000 years, there’s been a one-month bump in the alignment of the stars. Uh-oh. “We’re off by about 10 degrees or so, a twelfth of the way around,” Kunkle says.
What does this mean? Well, the StarTribune offers this calendar to be the real zodiac sign dates:
Capricorn: Jan. 20 – Feb. 16
Aquarius: Feb. 16 – March 11
Pisces: March 11- April 18
Aries: April 18- May 13
Taurus: May 13- June 21
Gemini: June 21- July 20
Cancer: July 20- Aug. 10
Leo: Aug. 10- Sept. 16
Virgo: Sept. 16- Oct. 30
Libra: Oct. 30- Nov. 23
Scorpio: Nov. 23- Nov. 29
Ophiuchus: Nov. 29- Dec. 17
Sagittarius: Dec. 17- Jan. 20
Based on this chart, I guess I have to divorce the hubby because he’s no longer my adored, quirky, witty, wild Sagittarius, he’s an Ophiuchus. Excuse me? What the heck is that?!? It’s the only sign discarded by the Babylonians, because they wanted 12 signs per year instead of lucky 13. Great, now I have to be married to an Ophiuchus and be anti-Babylonian too. Drats.
More importantly, this makes me a Capricorn. I don’t wanna be practical, prudent, patient and reserved. I like being an Aquarius. Original, inventive, independent, unemotional and detached. That’s what I’m good at.
So how does this newfangled chart change your sign? For better or worse?
Happy 2011 to all of my MommyQ readers! I hope you rang in 2011 with amazing amounts of fun, great friends and lots of bubbly. My hubby and I spent New Year’s Eve with our uninvited guest, Senior Stomach Flu. Needless to say, he was quite the downer.
People in Arkansas celebrated the New Year will over a 1,000 dead Red-Winged Blackbirds falling from the sky. How’s that for seriously creepy? The reports started rolling in around 11:30 p.m. The dead birds – thousands of them – fell over a 1-mile area of Beebe, and an aerial survey indicated that no other dead birds were found outside of that area. I’m a rather superstitious person, so I would’ve freaked the heck out had I been there for that. Hello bad omen. Wait a second, these birds were in Arkansas, right? Maybe it was suicide.What could be an even worse omen than the dead birds? How about an iPhone alarm glitch? Yep, there is a slight malfunction with the Apple software, so tons of hungover people woke up late on January 1st and January 2nd. I doubt that many alarms were buzzing that morning anyway. While being tardy because your iPhone alarm didn’t ring is a little scary, the Android Forum at Google’s site now has 1,257 comments (up till now) from Android phone owners and developers reporting of an issue which sends SMS messages to the wrong recipients in their address book. OUCH.And topping off weirdness for 2011 is the sad, sad news that Macaulay Culkin and his girlfriend of eight years, Mila Kunis, have split. It seems even the creepiest couple in Hollywood, who started dating when they were what, nine years old, can’t even survive. 2011 is proving to be very odd indeed.Images: Wave3 and People
Is LA Ink’s Kat Von D. getting back together with her old flame, Nikki Sixx of Motely Crue? She had been dating one of Hollywood’s most notorious bad boys lately (Sandra Bullock’s ex-hubby) Jesse James. The rumors are swirling that she said “goodbye” to the biker and “hello again” to the rocker. Von D. denies the rumors that she and Nikki are back together. Yet, take a look at these pics…
Okay, you got me. These aren’t real pics. They are MommyQ and her man rocking Halloween 2010. What fun costumes, huh? I think we did a pretty good job. What do you think?
Is this is what happens when you buy a really good bra? Nobody knows for sure whether Sarah Palin got breast implants or not, but this photo has launched a slew of rumors. My first reaction is who cares! She is a self-proclaimed hockey mom with FIVE kids. She looks awesome, implants or not. And if she got small mounds of help in the form of saline or silicone, good for her. Chances are, this is just the bra talkin’…
For the women in the world who have never invested in a good bra, the haunting words of Bill Engvall come to mind, “Here’s your sign!” The truth about nice undergarments, be it a bra or shapewear, is they do amazing things. And by amazing, I mean A-MAZ-ING! There are millions of women trotting through life in ill-fitting bras and cheap underwear. See what you’re missing? You could be hiding a total hottie under all of that sad fabric.
Need an example? This is the Wacoal Underwire Sports Bar. Notice how perky and round. (You can grab this comfortable slice of youth for $62 at Neiman Marcus.) Throw this beauty under a simple white tee and you’ll go from flat to fabulous. Maybe the big secret looming behind Sarah Palin’s knock-out figure is just a solid fitting by a sweet lady with a measuring tape. No knives required.
According to the May 31st issue of US Weekly, Sandra Bullock spent some time in the Music Capital of the World – Austin, TX – and did some shopping for baby Louis. On Friday, May 14th, Sandra & friends popped in Austin’s Izzy And Ash, a hip baby and kid’s boutique in Westlake, and picked up some cute finds.
The store owner, Jennifer Mazuelos, said Sandra was an easygoing mom and really seemed to enjoy shopping for baby stuff. Her fave items were baby hats and tees. (Sandra happened to be wearing a hat that day too!) Jennifer said Louis was a big baby, so Sandra was buying 18-24 month clothes. Okay, let’s cut to the good stuff. Here are some items she bought:
Chaser Tees Peace American Flag, Vintage Black Tee
Retails for $25 at Izzy and Ash.
City Threads Striped Blue Polo Shirt
Retails for $20.25 at Izzy and Ash
City Threads Charcoal Plaid Jersey Shorts
Retail for $23.25 at Izzy and Ash.
Want to see more items she bought, including the most adorable plaid baby cap you’ve ever seen? Check out this blog post on Droolicious for more of Louie’s goodies!
It is now official! America’s Sweetheart, actress Sandra Bullock has filed for divorce. According to Us Magazine, she filed April 23rd in Travis County Court in Austin, TX. And we are so happy to have her here!
The eight-page document states: “The marriage has become insupportable because of discord or conflict of personalities that destroys the legitimate end of the marriage/relationship and prevents any reasonable expectations of reconciliation.” The papers — filed under “B.A.S.” (Bullock’s initials backwards) — state that the actress and James, 40, who wed in 2005, “have ceased living together as husband and wife.”
On a bright note, Sandra recently announced that she has adopted a son, 3 1/2-month-old Louis from New Orleans. This news is flying around the Internet at a high rate of speed, but I think it’s because everyone is excited for her. As moms, we know how much love and joy enters your life as soon as you become a mother. Luckily for Sandra, she doesn’t have to worry about most struggles a single mom might face like working/income, etc. Anyway, she brought little Louis home in January and has been keeping it a secret until now.
From one mommy to another, congratulations!!!! Life tests you, but there is always a shining star somewhere in your midst. I think Sandra found hers!
Image: Us Magazine
You may have already heard, but one of the most famous mommies in the world is trying to gain weight. That’s right, I said GAIN weight. The perfectly posh Posh and her magnificent man, David Beckham, want another baby. They want a girl. Awwwwwe.
According to a variety of celebrity scoop sources, Victoria has begun to eat carbs for the first time since 1996. Well, I don’t the exact date but based on her teeny-tiny frame, I’m guessing it’s been a while since she ate a PB&J on white bread. She isn’t eating fast food, but she is allowing herself carbs like pasta and potatoes.
I’m sure her little guys, Brooklyn, 11, Romeo, 7, and Cruz, 5, are like, “Wow! Mummy is eating cake. This is so cool!” Can you imagine how hard it must be to skip on the birthday cake with that many kids. Yikes. I’m sure she thinks a portion of pasta is like 4 noodles. Anyway, wishing her the best and get ready for baby bump radar.
Image: People Magazine