If you haven’t heard, because your issue of Teen Beat hasn’t arrived in the mail yet, the Teen Choice Awards were on recently. Not sure what time or when, because I didn’t watch it. I’m a bit too old, a tad too busy and mostly, too uninterested. I did look at the Red Carpet outfits and I was expecting typical teenage-like controversy in the form of skimpy, leather and angry. Oddly enough, I was happily surprised.

Here are a few of my favorite looks. Plus, find out who rocked the cool ugly cute odd pumps pictured above:

Ashley Greene in Valentino
I have no clue who she is, but she looks amazing. I love the dress, the color, the fit, etc. A++ for lil’ Miss Ashley

Kourtney Kardashian in Sass & Bide
Kourt looks stunning. She puts the MILF in MILF, for sure. I love that she isn’t wearing black because her dark features look great in lighter shades. Kudos to the hot mama!

Kristen Bell in Stella McCartney
The sheer top and pattern in the dress is sophisticated and stylish. As Heidi Klum might say, it’s unexpected. The nude accents really make the dress pop. I want one.

Leighton Meester in Pucci
The dress is cute and it looks great with her dark hair and extremely l-o-n-g legs. I’m a fan of short skirts, so I certainly won’t knock her for that. But what about these shoes?
Winner, winner, chicken dinner?
OR
Uhm, eww?

I’m unable to make a firm decision, so I need your help. Do I love ‘em or hate ‘em?

Images: UsMagazine.com

I wrote a post this week over on Babble’s blog, Family Style: 5 Kid Shows that Won’t Annoy You. Yes, my beloved penguins made the list. That show might have the best one liners since Seinfeld. Believe it or not, this wasn’t an easy list to create. Let’s just say it was far easier to list the shows I don’t like, as opposed to the shows I like.  There are a few things about kid shows I just can’t stand:

1. – Men wearing tights. I find this totally ridiculous. What happened to normal pants? Why in the world does a grown man need to jump around and dance for an audience of small children wearing nothing but a smile and thin layer of spandex? If you know, please enlighten me.

2. – Characters with mismatched outfits. I understand these shows are all about bright colors and carefree attitudes, but why must the characters wear a pink top, orange socks, purple shoes, green shorts, etc. It really starts to bug me after the first 10 minutes. I keep wishing for a “makeover” episode where the character gets a new look and they burn the bad clothes in an animated inferno.

3. – Cartoon animals with tails. Have you noticed the Wonder Pets character, Tuck (the turtle), no longer has a tail? I won’t elaborate, but when he stands up and walks around, it doesn’t look like a tail….

4. – Puppet people. Oh, the downright freaky, puppet people. These cartoons feature a mixture of real people and people in puppet-like costumes. It doesn’t bother me in shows like Sesame Street because all of those characters are fluffy and lovable. In the newer shows, these characters are creepy and unnerving. If one of them rang my doorbell, I’d surely grab a weapon.

5. – Tricking us with yelling disguised as singing. You might be able to fool a toddler, but adults know the difference. Just because you can be really loud and read lyrics, doesn’t make it a song.

On the flip side, want to see which kid shows I love?  Hop over to Family Style! I’ve listed five educational, unique and witty shows that won’t make you wince at all.

I was half-asleep this morning when my sweet hubby started reading soccer news to me from his iPhone. I heard him ramble about “Paul The Octopus” and I thought he was talking about an Italian commentator named Paul who was dubbed with the nickname “octopus” because of his reputation as a womanizer. As he kept reading and I became more lucid, I realized he was talking about an actual octopus. What?!?

Yes, this Sea Life Aquarium resident has chosen World Cup winners with 100% accuracy. How does an octopus physically choose, you might ask. Well, he is given a clear tank with two separate boxes in it. Each box contains his food and displays a flag of each team. If he opens the lid and picks food from that box, he had made his prediction. You must see the video on YouTube as it’s quite amazing.

What will this poor fishy do after the World Cup is over? I was thinking reality television, but it would be too expensive to outfit him in Jimmy Choos, he’s not great at the art of backstabbing his friends and he certainly doesn’t need Botox. Then it hit me – OPRAH! Paul would bring a whole new element of excitement to daytime television as the host of  Oprah’s show. Can you imagine how memorable Paul’s interview with Tom Cruise might be? You know Tom would go for it since we all saw him talk to aquatic life in Jerry Maguire.

Paul would be whiz with Martha Stewart as a guest because he could hold eight meat cleavers at once. You know those episodes when Oprah gives a family a new car? Can’t you see a car pulling up with an octopus clinging to it for dear life? Like totally stuck on the hood with it’s gooey arms wrapped around the windshield? Besides, Paul could give great big hugs to guests after an emotional breakdown and he would never gloat about his fortune.  It makes sense to me. Perfect sense.

Image: The Examiner

If you love Project Runway like me, you’ll be excited to know Nina Garcia is coming out with a new book! The most recognized fashionista on television, who scrutinizes Project Runway contestants with brutal honestly and great one-liners, has announced Nina Garcia’s Look Book: What To Wear For Every Occasion, will be available on August 10, 2010. Oh, and she’s also the fashion director for Marie Claire. Like you didn’t know!

In the book, Nina Garcia answers the universal question all women at one point ask themselves when attending some of life’s most important events: “What should I wear?”  In her most practical—yet stylish as ever—project to date, Nina focuses her attention on what every woman needs to know when choosing what to wear to any life event—whether it be a job interview, a first date, or even a parent/teacher conference.  And let me tell you, lots of moms need help with this one.

The fun, flirty, illustrated guide features original four-color artwork by acclaimed artist Ruben Toledo, which compliments Nina’s trademark tone of voice. Whether you are already a fierce fashion diva or someone in need of  some couture advice, Nina’s book provides easy to understand, practical examples that will make you look and feel fabulous inside and out. Make a mental note in your stylish brain to get this book!!!

When it comes to trendy clothes, you know a killer asymmetrical dress works wonders.  I happen to love one-shoulder dresses and tops, but LuAnn is demonstrating obsessive behavior when it comes to her spatial relationship with clothes. Pun intended.

Don’t get me wrong, I think LuAnn is quite beautiful with a great body and that cool raspy voice. In my opinion, she is far more striking and naturally pretty than Kelly.  But why so many asymmetric necklines? What is with that?!?

When Ramona made the comment jokingly in all seriousness, “I think your purple dress with the one-shoulder is ridiculous,” I almost fell out of my chair. Yes! Ramona  finally said something intelligent. LuAnn, I love ya babe, but that dress is ridiculous.  I’m not sure if someone she respects in the fashion industry told her it’s a good style for her body type or what, but owning more than 20 one-shoulder dresses is probably a no-no, even for a duchess or a princess or a countess.

Who’s with me? Shall we start making phone calls and schedule this intervention? I’ll bring the Pinot Grigio.

For the women in the world who have never invested in a good bra, the haunting words of Bill Engvall come to mind, “Here’s your sign!” The truth about nice undergarments, be it a bra or shapewear, is they do amazing things. And by amazing, I mean A-MAZ-ING! There are millions of women trotting through life in ill-fitting bras and cheap underwear.  See what you’re missing? You could be hiding a total hottie under all of that sad fabric.

Need an example? This is the Wacoal Underwire Sports Bar. Notice how perky and round. (You can grab this comfortable slice of youth for $62 at Neiman Marcus.)  Throw this beauty under a simple white tee and you’ll go from flat to fabulous. Maybe the big secret looming behind Sarah Palin’s knock-out figure is just a solid fitting by a sweet lady with a measuring tape. No knives required.

Miley Cyrus is going through her bodysuit phase – just like Madonna, Britney, Beyonce, Gaga, Pink and Rihanna. Who really cares! I understand, she’s only 17 years old and maybe it’s not appropriate for a girl that age to dress so seductively. Plus, she’s a role model to a young generation of girls.

All of this in incredibly legit, but what people fail to realize is if you’re a superstar, you don’t have to wear pants. That’s pretty much the point. Pants are optional when you make a gazillion dollars. When female celebrities stop wearing pants, they are sending out a sign of success. As soon as you see MommyQ strutting around without pants, you’ll know I’ve made it big.

Is there more to debate here? Is Miley a teen dynamo who wants to shed her Disney-created, squeaky clean image? Of course. She wants the world to know she’s an independent tween.  It’s her party and she’ll cry if she wants to.  Is she making bad choices? Absolutely. Will the public forgive her? Minus the moms of impressionable young girls, uhm, yes. Until all of that happens, she’ll keep strutting her stuff in a form-fitting garment that covers the torso and not much more. Let’s talk about something just a tad more important now, okay?

The store owner, Jennifer Mazuelos, said Sandra was an easygoing mom and really seemed to enjoy shopping for baby stuff. Her fave items were baby hats and tees. (Sandra happened to be wearing a hat that day too!) Jennifer said Louis was a big baby, so Sandra was buying 18-24 month clothes. Okay, let’s cut to the good stuff. Here are some items she bought:

Chaser Tees Peace American Flag, Vintage Black Tee
Retails for $25 at Izzy and Ash.

City Threads Striped Blue Polo Shirt
Retails for $20.25 at Izzy and Ash

City Threads Charcoal Plaid Jersey Shorts
Retail for $23.25 at Izzy and Ash.

Want to see more items she bought, including the most adorable plaid baby cap you’ve ever seen? Check out this blog post on Droolicious for more of Louie’s goodies!

It’s a  rainy, muddy, dreary day for the running of the Kentucky Derby. The track is wet & sloppy and there is a brisk rain and a cold wind. Yuck! I feel so bad for all of my friends who are there right now. Hopefully they are enjoying plenty of Mint Juleps and feeling no pain. Maybe they’ll win a few bucks too. That would help.

As you know, the Derby Hat Parade is practically more thrilling than the race. You can see all of the magnificent hats by clicking here. It’s like Carnival for your head! Want to see some of the celebrities who have graced Churchill Downs for the “Run for the Roses” – Brooke Shields, Kim Kardashian, Danica Patrick and many more!

I came across this hat last week on Etsy and just had to blog about it. I was reading about all of the women looking for that PERFECT Kentucky Derby hat and I thought this was a great fit. What a lovely hat for baby girl! I’m just amazed at the yarny goodness. You can read more about this beauty on Droolicious.

It is now official! America’s Sweetheart, actress Sandra Bullock has filed for divorce. According to Us Magazine, she filed April 23rd in Travis County Court in Austin, TX.  And we are so happy to have her here!

The eight-page document states: “The marriage has become insupportable because of discord or conflict of personalities that destroys the legitimate end of the marriage/relationship and prevents any reasonable expectations of reconciliation.” The papers — filed under “B.A.S.” (Bullock’s initials backwards) — state that the actress and James, 40, who wed in 2005, “have ceased living together as husband and wife.”

On a bright note, Sandra recently announced that she has adopted a son, 3 1/2-month-old Louis from New Orleans. This news is flying around the Internet at a high rate of speed, but I think it’s because everyone is excited for her. As moms, we know how much love and joy enters your life as soon as you become a mother. Luckily for Sandra, she doesn’t have to worry about most struggles a single mom might face like working/income, etc.  Anyway, she brought little Louis home in January and has been keeping it a secret until now.

From one mommy to another, congratulations!!!! Life tests you, but there is always a shining star somewhere in your midst. I think Sandra found hers!

Image: Us Magazine

First of all, when I tuned in to the finale of Project Runway on our big HDTV, the Lifetime channel (26 in Austin) is NOT WORKING. Black, blank screen. What the freak? I run upstairs and start watching it on the tiny television in my kid’s playroom. Super crapola. Here’s a play-by-play of the show. It’s semi-liveblogging.

-I tuned in as they were working out some makeup details with Collier Strong and let me say the “dark eye” is just fabulous. I wish I had the courage to wear that look. I applaud Mila for choosing that look because it’s stunning up close and from a distance.

- Emilio is freaking out because he’s missing models or a model.  Whatever. He’s such a priss.

- Watching a commercial for Sex and the City 2 and wondering why they would ever write a camel into the plot. Seems odd. I’m sure I’ll have to watch the movie to find out. I’m a marketers dream!

- The models are lined up and Seth Aaron says he’s “amped” and for good reason.

- Heidi welcomes the crowd, looking gorgeous as always, but the dress looks like something in the Kardashian collection at Bebe. I’m sure everyone else will love it. It not my fave.

- Seth Aaron goes first and was inspired by the German military. (Trying to get on Heidi’s good side, perhaps?) Sounds familiar. His collection is really stunning! All black and white with red accents and yellow plaid. It’s like Hollywood rocker meets Burberry prep. His final piece is a wild purple thing I’ve never seen before. Let’s call it a dress. Wow, his clothes are absolutely impeccable.

- Oh boy, now Mila is crying about how hard she worked for this. Blah, blah, blah. Every person on the show has worked hard, even the folks who got auf’d. Sorry, I’m not really a Mila fan. I was hoping Jay would have made it to Fashion Week instead. His clothes seemed more inspired to me, except that awful MJ jacket.

- Mila was inspired by shadows for her collection. It’s black and white, just like Seth Aaron. OMG. It’s so similar to SA’s collection. Wow. It’s much more hip and innovative than many of the clothes she designed during the show. I’d say Michael Kors will like it because it seems commercial. Nothing really jumped out at me though.

- Emilio steps up to the plate now. His collection is called “Color Me Bad” and that is hilarious. The red dress is incredible for sure. I like the red pieces a lot – love those gloves – but not crazy about the blue and the brown pieces. I don’t get the color palette he chose, but what do I know. As Nina would say, it doesn’t seem cohesive. The final frock is way to gold. I’m not feeling these clothes as much.

- The judges are blown away by the show. Really?  Shocker.

- Faith Hill is just adorable. What a fun guest judge! The judges love Seth Aaron’s stuff, but they also didn’t get the purple dress. Heidi is wondering why Emilio named it “Color Me Bad.” Oh, Faith loves Emilio’s coats. Heidi likes his prints – with his name.

- Michel Kors liked Emilio’s gold gown. Interesting. It is totally commercial. Nina thinks it was heavy on the suits. I agree with her. Emilio said he wanted to showcase his sportswear. Mila again with shadows. “Layers, textures, dimensions,” she says. Michael, Heidi and Nina are glad she made the style more hip and now. Heidi liked the white t-shirt with the black stripes – so 80s!

- Michael’s issues are no surprises with Mila, too much over-working with Seth Aaron and no drama (showmanship) from Emilio.

- And the winner of Project Runway, Season 7, is… NOT Mila. She just got auf’d.

- And the winner of Project Runway, Season 7 is Seth Aaron. Congrats!!!

Image: MyLifetime.com

You may have already heard, but one of the most famous mommies in the world is trying to gain weight. That’s right, I said GAIN weight. The perfectly posh Posh and her magnificent man, David Beckham, want another baby. They want a girl. Awwwwwe.

According to a variety of celebrity scoop sources, Victoria has begun to eat carbs for the first time since 1996. Well, I don’t the exact date but based on her teeny-tiny frame, I’m guessing it’s been a while since she ate a PB&J on white bread.  She isn’t eating fast food, but she is allowing herself carbs like pasta and potatoes.

I’m sure her little guys, Brooklyn, 11, Romeo, 7, and Cruz, 5, are like, “Wow! Mummy is eating cake. This is so cool!” Can you imagine how hard it must be to skip on the birthday cake with that many kids. Yikes. I’m sure she thinks a portion of pasta is like 4 noodles. Anyway, wishing her the best and get ready for baby bump radar.

Image: People Magazine

Spotted in Italy  last weekend was Angelina Jolie and her sweet little girl, Vivienne. Vivienne is wearing the Nicolette in navy suede by Stride Rite, one of my favorite shoe brands for kiddos. This shoe is one of their classic mary jane styles, updated with a flower accent. Other colors and leathers in this style include pearlized & patent leather (for a little dressier look) and berry, dark brown and black tones. Beautiful!

And, as always, the shoe includes Stride Rite’s Natural Motion System technology, padded collar and cradled footbed, ensuring a comfortable fit for the little ones. Shop them at Stride Rite for $50.

Top Image: MatrixPhotos.com

It comes as no surprise that Lourdes, Madonna’s 13-year-old daughter, is now dipping a toe into the fame pool. She has been dabbling in acting, fashion design, dancing & singing. And why not? If Madonna was my mommy, I’d be all over that stuff too. But Madonna is one smart lady and has been taking every exciting step with Lourdes, serving as the ultimate stage mom.

I chatted with Paul Harris, a reporter for The Examiner, on Sunday about Madonna’s choices for her daughter. My main feeling (as the biggest non-celebrity ever) is Madonna cares deeply about Lourdes and her safety. Being thrust into the spotlight is one thing, but growing up in it is quite different. I think Lourdes already knows a lot about what to do and what not to do — much more so than many new actors twice her age. Madonna is watching over her like a hawk and that’s just what any good mother should do.

My quotes in the article is, “At the end of the day, if you are Madonna or any other parent, you are still all dealing with diapers and kids falling down and scraping their knees.” Okay, so maybe Madonna didn’t change diapers back in the day or put Snoopy Band-aids on boo-boos, but maybe she did. My point is all moms (and parents for that matter), deal with the same issues whether you’re famous or not. We worry, support, laugh, cry, comfort, help, nurture and protect. Madonna wants the best for her daughter and we can all relate to that.

Read the full article here. Image: Matt Baron/BEI / Rex Features

I’m thrilled to see Sandra Bullock in the next issue of SUCCESS Magazine, available April 6th.  If you haven’t heard of SUCCESS, it’s a magazine that brings you the thought leaders and success experts, both past and present, and reveals their key ideas and strategies to help you excel in every area of your personal and professional life.

In the May issue, the Oscar-winning actress reveals that before she was one of Hollywood’s leading ladies she was picked on as a child by her classmates for a speech impediment. Can you believe that? It was her mother who encouraged her to embrace her uniqueness, “Uniqueness is something my mother pounded into me,” says Bullock. “I’ve made peace with the fact that the things that I thought were weaknesses or flaws were just me, and I like them.”

As the mom of a child with Autism Spectrum Disorder, knowing someone as talented as Sandra Bullock had obstacles to overcome as a child gives me more hope for my own son. It helps me remember things may seem insurmountable at the moment, but in time they will just be memories. I hope we all provide our children with the ability to embrace their uniqueness.

The article is uplifting and honest, a great read for parents. Bullock’s advice for little girls? “Don’t change. Be who you are.”

Image: SUCCESS Magazine

Get more celebrity scoop from MommyQ!

No wonder singer Carrie Underwood is such a star. She is draped in bling – literally. Emmy award winning costume designer Soyon An has created a ground-breaking wardrobe for country superstar Carrie Underwood using Swarovski Elements.

The sparkling costumes of Carrie Underwood’s “Play On Tour”, are encrusted with over 152,000 Swarovski Elements, debuting a new, glamorous look for the artist. Soyon An’s experience of designing for shows such as So You Think You Can Dance and American Idol enabled her to develop innovative creations that dazzle the audience.

Want to find the individual Swarovski crystals used for Carrie’s costumes? Just click here.

Image: Matt Sperling

The April issue of SELF  features a really great interview with Grey’s Anatomy star, Ellen Pompeo, where she dishes on her secrets to handling marriage-motherhood-career while staying sane and enjoying it.  That sounds heavenly to me!

She reveals her pregnancy truths (“I was like, ‘Oh, God, it worked! Oh no!’”), her brown-bag lunch strategy, the 6 foods on her personal “energy diet,” and lessons she’ll teach her daughter (“I hope Stella has more self-confidence than I did as a child.”).

What does she have to say about happiness? “It’s easy to get lost in the baby. But you have to make the time for your relationships. You have to make sure you give your husband attention. And I still see my friends all the time, too. It’s important to have a well-rounded life. You learn things from your friends, and they bring you joy, and you bring back all that happiness to your baby.”

My favorite Top Chef mommy, Padma Lakshmi, was seen playing her new baby girl in Manhatten. This is little Krishna Thea who is only 3 weeks old. Look at that teeny tiny pink onesie!

Padma, 39, welcomed her first baby into the delish world on February 20th. I just love Padma and she looked so beautiful when she was hosting Top Chef while pregnant. She certainly did it Heidi Klum-style.

Image: People Magazine

I’m not joking. You know vampires really do rule the world when you see charity events like this – Celebrity Vampire Baseball ™ to be held in New Orleans on March 20th. You can meet Twilight, New Moon and True Blood fang-faves, as well as other athletes, actors and randoms. My outspoken, gold-pants-wearing boy, Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) will be playing too!

The event is brought to you  by Twilight Fan Trips and yes, that’s real too.  Highlights of this unique baseball adventure include watching an exhibition game, getting autographs and photos with the stars, meet and greets, and an exciting after-party and concert. 25% of net proceeds from each celebrity baseball ticket sale will go towards Haitian Relief organizations to support their ongoing efforts to rebuild lives destroyed by this disaster.

This is my favorite part for sure. A portion of proceeds will also be used to support New Orleans non-profit organizations such as The Blood Center, which will host an on-site blood drive. Yummy.

According to my source (SaraGNYC), Rebecca Gayheart and Eric Dane are to be bringing home their new baby girl in a pink Little Giraffe baby blanket! The luxe, ultra-soft blankies are available at Nordstrom for $62. These new parents join other celebrity fans of Little Giraffe like Gwen Stefani, Nicole Richie, Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Jennifer Garner, and Jaime Pressly.

I was watching the Real Housewives of the OC reunion show last week, and evidently Gretchen Rossi’s hair is a big deal. I think she always looks pretty (and she is my favorite housewife!), but I never really noticed her hair. During the show they talk about how many viewers are in luuuv with her hairdo. (Scroll down to the comments to see what I mean.)

She says she doesn’t wear extensions and she achieves her look with big hot rollers. Hot rollers! Wow, I haven’t thought about those in forever. In fact, I haven’t owned hot rollers in about 10 years.

I certainly used them back in the day, but we all did. My friends with long hair would even sleep in foam rollers for the big, bouncy head of curls the next day. Out of curiosity, I checked out the hot rollers at CVS and chuckled. They haven’t changed much. This week, I’m going to check out what Target has and if they have the really big rollers, I might even indulge.

What about you? Are hot rollers still part of your beauty secret?

Wanna know what’s in the Golden Globe goody bag this year? Well, the bag is worth $500. (Doesn’t that seem low? Maybe Hollywood isn’t recession-proof after all.)

Hers:
- A large Dooney & Bourke satchel
- Euphoria perfume by Calvin Klein
- L’Oreal cosmetics
- InStyle’s book, “The New Secrets of Style”

His:
- Tumi duffle bag
- Euphoria for men
- A custom shirt by designer Alexander West
- A style book for guys

The Presenters Lounge backstage is an entirely different story. The artwork alone is worth $3 million. Yes, $3 mil in a room for stars to apply more lip gloss. Or Botox – whatever.  Read more at People.

Image: People.com

What happens when Posh needs more signature, over-sized shades? She hops over to Milan, Italy,  where her hot hubby plays soccer (on loan) and buys a new pair. Or twelve.

Rumor has it she bought a $700k Rolex watch (for Becks), an insane amount of handbags and 20 new pairs of 5-inch heels. In fact, the couture house of Dolce & Gabbana (or maybe it was Armani) on Via Montenapoleone closed so she could shop in private.Oh, you can add evening gowns, cocktails dresses and luxury luggage to the list too. On to the furniture. She picked up five bespoke sofas from Natuzzi. And two bespoke suits for Becks.

This should make you feel much better about your $100 splurge at Target. Wanna see a hot D&G shoe option? The one listed below retails for $995. Yummy!

Maybe it’s because the weather has been so cold or maybe it’s because this looks so super-duper cozy. No matter what the reason is I love this maternity sweater. This is the Cable Batwing Sweater at Isabella Oliver and it’s on sale now for $167.

Speaking of looking fab with a baby bump, my favorite momtrepreneur, Heidi Klum, announced today she is working on two maternity lines. It’s about time! She chases around her four kiddos and still has time to do Project Runway, design jewelry and clothes and look incredible the whole time. Now that is talent, my friends.

Lavish and Loved will debut online and in stores February 12, 2010. A Pea In The Pod and Motherhood will carry her items. Lavish features iconic looks and Loved is affordable. (We’ll see!) Read more about it here!

Read more from MommyQ – Project Runway: Who’s Getting Auf’d Tonight?

Is it our business? Of course not. What happened between him and his wife (and the tree) is totally NOT our business. Humans, being the flawed people we are by nature, want to know about it because we’re just plain nosy. We like to think ultra-rich, ridiculously famous people have problems in their lives just like we do.  It makes us feel better about ourselves. Yes, in some sick way maybe we’re all  looking for an interesting distraction that makes us go, “Hmmmm, maybe my life is peachy-keen just the way it is.

Even when people act like they’re too good to talk about Tiger’s situation – like certain talk show hosts did this morning – they’re still talking about it. They’re still taking part in spreading the story. Like me writing about it right now. Yes, I’m making it worse but I openly admit it. I’m jumping on the bandwagon for sure. I find the whole story interesting in a twisted, unbelievable way. To think even the gorgeous Elin – or Fergie or Gwyneth or a zillion other beautiful celebrities, for that matter – could possibly be cheated on is mind-boggling. You look at picture-perfect couples with fame and fortune and think they have it all. We may be reminded over and over and over again that they don’t have it all, yet we still look at them in awe. I find that slightly amusing in a pathetic sort of way.

Anyway, I’m sure the truth will emerge in the next few days and we’ll all forget about this by next week. If you want to see the most deplorable response to this whole ordeal, check out the article on Eonline, “Five Things You Need to Know About Tiger Woods’ Alleged Other Woman Rachel Uchitel.” This is the most appalling, faux-news, story out there at the moment.  That article is the epitome of throwing a bunch of useless facts together for the sole purpose of stirring the pot.

Whether the affair is true or not, my heart goes out to Tiger, his wife and family. Why? Because I’m a wife and a mother. This is horrible stuff to live with no matter what the real story may be. Remember, there is no “delete” button for stories published on the Internet that turn out to be wrong.

Well, nobody actually.

Tonight is The Finale Part I of Project Runway and I’m so excited. This has been an interesting season, but not due to the contestants. I actually think there isn’t enough drama between them this season. Other than the tiny amount of tension between Irina and Althea because of an enormous sweater thingy, it’s been pretty ho-hum. I think the most interesting element has been the harsh judging. And the fact that Lindsay Lohan was like the worst, most ironic guest-judge of all times. I believe she questioned a designer’s “taste” and that is hilarious.

I’m a fan of Carol Hannah because I love her design aesthetic and her sweet personality. Not to mention she can sew a dress that fits like a glove – flawless execution! Tonight Rebecca Romijn will be the guest judge. I LOVE it when models are guests like last week when Cindy Crawford joined the panel. I am always amazed when someone’s beauty can stand up to Heidi because she is just so gorgeous.

I love Tim Gunn and Michael Kors still has the best one-liners. If you wanna own something cool from Mr. Kors, yet don’t want to spend a fortune, check out this little gem. It’s the Very Hollywood Eau de Parfum Ring and isn’t it a great gift for the holidays? You can find it for $40 at Michael Kors.

In my opinion, you’re either a fan of LC (Lauren Conrad) or you’re not. When I first started watching The Hills, I thought she became more likable as the show progressed, but I was never overly impressed with her sense of style. Maybe it’s because my attention was always being diverted to Kristen and her catty ways. I love watching spoiled, rich, divas be bitchy to each other. And the fact that they were graduating high school – so amusing.

LC emerged from The Hills as a budding fashion designer. She “designed” her first collection that was supposed to be rather pricey, but I don’t think it really took off. Now she is unveiling a ready-to-wear line at Kohl’s department stores. Speaking of Kohl’s, did you know Vera Wang has a line there called ‘Simply Vera’…

You can see LC’s collection at Kohl’s online by clicking here. I’m not being mean because I don’t have a line of clothes for sale, but I’d say this stuff is rather ho-hum. Where are the cool hobo bags and the chunky belts and the rompers and the bright colors? What about mini dress? I get that it’s supposed to wearable, but a cami and two cardigan sweaters? How hard is that to design? Again, not being mean…just wondering.

Tulle skirts may seem like old news, but they are still hot for little girls. Just take a look at some of the A-list babies bopping around town in their tulle outfits. Nahla Aubrey, Suri Cruise and Violet Affleck are just a few of the princesses who really love twirling in tulle.

Gymboree is making tulle cool for Fall by offering this chocolate-colored skirt in sizes 3-6 mos up to 5T! Perfect for parties or a trip to the playground. On sale for $20 at Gymboree.

There, I said it. One of my friends on Facebook recently admitted to liking the new Miley Cyrus song, “The Climb.” I have a lot of respect for people who willingly admit potentially embarrassing truths, so I took her lead and decided to throw props to Tori Spelling, especially in the wake of her mother’s continued public betrayal.

I have to be honest, I wasn’t a big fan of Tori Spelling during the 90210 days. In fact, I didn’t really like the show at all. The plot was horribly predictable and the amount of hair gel being used on the boys was obscene. Last year, I started watching reruns of Tori & Dean: Inn Love and was just amazed at how quickly I started to like Tori. She was funny, sincere, sweet, honest, goofy and even vulnerable.

The show didn’t seem overly contrived  me and the whole notion of a Hollywood couple trying to downsize their lives (while pregnant) and renovating a B & B at the same time was pretty entertaining. I haven’t seen the new show, Home Sweet Hollywood, but as a mother with two small children myself, I know it can only be non-stop chaos. The good kind.

Today rumors fly about Tori’s weight and Tori’s psycho mom, Candy, etc. I have no idea what’s true and what isn’t, but I feel sorry for her. When push comes to shove she’s a woman, wife and mother trying to make it all work. That’s no easy feat. If my mom started sending open letters to TMZ about what should be private issues, I’d be mortified.

Maybe this all a big publicity stunt – who knows? If it’s not, It’s just plain sad. And not the good kind.

According to a recent article in The New York Times, eyebrows are out. Mechanical is in. This year, the forehead is the perfect blank canvas for beauty. In NYC, fashion-forward men are bleaching them away and some women are shaving them off.  If they aren’t shaving them off, they are blocking them out with cosmetics. Forget buying a new bag or a hot pair of heels to spice up your wardrobe, just sport shown brows.

So you mean a few years ago when my husband (who shaves his head) was haphazardly shaving his face and cut off an eyebrow – that was fashionable? Poor guy! Had he known, he might not have felt so silly all those months he spent waiting for it to grow back.

And me? Well, I’m a brunette and the idea of lopping off my eyebrows in the name of fashion seems rather hasty. They help to define my facial features. Although I do have bangs, so you can’t see them that well anyway. Maybe I should! After all, these tough economic times are making us all more cutting-edge. (Excuse me, what?!?) Ah, yes…because eyebrows are so high maintenance.

How many times have I thought to myself, “I could save thousands of dollars a year if I just didn’t have to deal with my eyebrows. How I wish there was a way to avoid that costly habit.” I guess my prayers have been answered. Lather up!

I was watching the All-Star Game last night and taking note of President Obama’s first pitch. The toss was fine, but something was amiss. Was it his jacket? Well, I was ticked it wasn’t a Yankee jacket, but that wasn’t it. The hair? No, that looked nice. It was his goofy, non-designer jeans! Wait a second. I thought he was ultra-stylish? What’s with the dorky denim choice?

Maybe he was going for comfort or maybe he just wanted to look like one of the guys. No matter what the reason was, it was a huge fashion faux pas. Let’s face it, we all know expensive designer jeans are the new ‘cool guy’ uniform. And my gal Sarah Palin would have never walked out in dowdy mom jeans! I’m not sure which brand he was casually sporting – Levi’s, Wrangler, Lee, Canyon River Blues from Sears – all I can say is, “yikes!” This guy needs to Bluefly!

What Obama needs is a slim fit with a slight flair. By no means does he need a skinny jean though! He should be slipping into a pair of True Religion, PRPS, 7 for All Mankind or at the very least, Diesel. Hopefully his press folks will hear enough negative buzz that they will whisk him off to Nordstrom for a pair of medium blue faded bootcuts posthaste!

Michael Jackson was my very first idol. I was a child who happened to love dancing, whether it was tap, ballet or jazz, and I loved pop music. My first memory of Michael Jackson was dancing to ‘Beat It’ during a dance recital. I was the only girl in the class who had fully mastered the ever-popular moonwalk. It came to me naturally and I remember trying to teach other girls in the class how to do it because they had trouble figuring it out.

I was a huge Michael Jackson fan for many years. Thriller was my most favorite album and I listened to it on a daily basis. I knew every song by heart and absolutely loved them all. After much pleading and begging, I finally convinced my mom to let me hang two of his posters in my room, as long as I didn’t use too much tape as she didn’t want me to ruin the walls when they came down. I also remember innocently thinking to myself, “why would I ever take them down?”

My cool friends were all into Duran Duran and other more hip groups during that time. I was often the butt of jokes for liking Michael Jackson, owning two pair of parachute pants and wearing big white socks with black shoes, but it didn’t phase me. Watching him sing and dance was electrifying. His talent and skills moved me in a way I couldn’t explain. He was mesmerizing and seeing clips of his performance at the Motown 25th Anniversary show still gives me chills.

I even used Michael Jackson as a gauge for how bad my colds were when I was a kid. For example, if I were home sick, was I too sick to dance with Michael? Like if he magically showed up at my door and wanted to dance with me, was I too sick to dance with him? If so, I was pretty darn sick and probably running a fever. If not, I wasn’t very sick.

Needless to say, the posters eventually came down. I don’t remember what motivated me to take them down, but they were never replaced with someone new.  It may be selfish, but this is how I will always remember the King of Pop. I do not care to think about his scandals, his eccentricities or his surgeries. He will always be an inspiration to me and I hope others choose to remember the good years too. Rest in peace, Michael. And thank you for the memories.

It may look like a normal bag, but it has tons of storage compartments and insulated pockets, not to mention a padded changing mat, detachable bag, mobile pocket (who doesn’t need one of those!) and wipe-clean lining. Go ahead, it’s still cool to be like Angie.

If you’re looking for an even more indulgent diaper bag, check out the Felix Ray ‘Emma’ Diaper Bag. Pleated details, a bow and goldtone studs? FUN! And you’ll be paying for that fun too. It retails for $450 at Nordstrom.

Jon & Kate Plus 8 – I’m sorry, who? I can’t even speak intelligently about this potentially splitting duo with ocho kidlets, because I’ve never watched the show. I have heard that Kate Gosselin has been quoted a bunch because normal women like us (and her) have been requesting her haircut. Not sure if that’s true or not, but Kate needs to walk in Jennifer Aniston’s footsteps on this one and turn the whole haircut craze into pure gold. It’s spiky, soft, dark, light, long and short all at once. Come on, what’s more fun than a bi-polar hairdo?

Jessica Simpson’s Reality TV Show – I’m afraid this one won’t be half as entertaining as Newlyweds, which spawned some of her greatest one-liners ever. “Sorry, I don’t eat buffalo.”  This show is about the importance of what’s on the inside as opposed to being judged on outer beauty. No offense, but we all know what’s on the inside – gross-looking, stinky, icky organs and guts. Jess, we’d rather watch you pronounce platypus.

Suri’s B-Day Party – TomKat spent about $100k on Suri’s birthday party. The cake alone was $5k and the catering bill was about $45k. Surprised? Anyone? Anyone?  I guess when you have all the money you could ever want from doing movies with a chip on your shoulder and at least one solo running sequence, you can throw a bash like this for your toddler. It will be awesome to see what Suri’s sweet sixteen party will be like. Think about it. If you have to outdo yourself every year with something more extravagant than the previous year, let’s say you have to spend $10k more per year. If my math is correct, by the age of 16 her parties will cost around $240k. And if you nodded in agreement with anything in this paragraph, you need to get help. Seriously, there are clean padded cells waiting for your arrival.

Adriana Lima Gets Fat – The beautiful Brazilian supermodel is expecting her first baby this winter. You’re about to meet the real Mother Nature, Ms. Secret, and she isn’t all that fond of bodies that can rock skimpy bikinis and prance around in a confident non-jiggling way. Say goodbye to fruits & veggies, and say hello to your new diet, muffin tops!

Melissa Joan Hart Gets Thin – I am so tired of trying to keep track of who is fat and who is thin. Why can’t celebs just pick a size and stick with it! It would be so considerate to the rest of us. If you’ve been thin for a long time like Nicole Ritchie or Kelly Ripa, you will be dubbed as “thin” forever, even if you gain like 20 pounds.  Anyway, Melissa decided to lose her baby weight and People thought, “Hmmm, photographing a bikini-clad celebrity in a before-and-after weight loss story, what a unique idea!”

I, MommyQ, am in my mid-30s with two small children under the age of five. After a day with my spirited, funny, active, goofy, demanding, jumping, leaping, walking, running, throwing, tossing, eating, napping, griping, giggling, smiling, frowning kiddos, I’m exhausted – both physically and emotionally. Again, I’m in my mid-30s. Based on nothing personal about the woman – just math – I think this is a sadly selfish, unethical situation.

When her child is an active toddler, she will be approaching 70-years-old. When her child is ten-years-old, she will be getting close to 80-years-old. It’s simple mathematics. Just because one can do something, doesn’t mean one should. In my silly little opinion, this is completely unfair to the child. I cannot imagine being 30 years older than I am and attempting to raise a newborn. It’s too absurd to even consider.

Adeney might be the best, most loving parent in the world, but the odds are not in her favor to be around for her child’s life. Not to mention, the ew factor is pretty high too. (Having a baby at 66? Ew.)

What do you think MommyQ readers? Is she just another pregnant lady?

You may know her as Chelsea Lately, the hilariously sarcastic comedienne on E! I know her as Hero #3. I’m not sure who my first two heroes are, but Chelsea certainly gets the third spot.

Her show is just the right amount of news, celeb gossip and cynicism, which I really appreciate at the end of the day. You know what I mean, everything – no matter how profound – is just plain old stupid or annoying by 10:00 p.m. I don’t want to hear one serious thought after 9:36 p.m.  And Chelsea gets that! Ah, refreshing.

Anyway, if you haven’t seen the show yet, you should tune in one night. I assure you it will either make you laugh or deeply offend you. Either way, it’s thoroughly entertaining. Just a friendly TV tip from MommyQ.

The outspoken Elizabeth Hasselbeck came up with this Tunic Dress. Not to be mean, but isn’t this something you learn how to make in Sewing 101? Is a caftan neckline really that remarkable? I don’t know. It looks opinionated and slightly annoying for $298.

Angie Harmon designed this little Shift Dress and I give it two thumbs up. It’s simple, fresh and youthful. I love the mod square appliques mixed with the scroll print.  The back of the dress is really pretty too. Yours for $328.

Look at this bikini and tell me what you see. What? Did you say nothing special? If so, I couldn’t agree more. So Gwyneth Paltrow designed this Patchwork Bikini. I’m not really sure how one would go about designing a really cool bathing suit, but this just seems so plain. Swim like Gwyneth  for $178.

A $428  ZigZag Maxi Dress. In some way it totally screams “Grace” er… I mean, Debra Messing. In other ways, it  looks a bit sad. It’s not really in the Lilly Pulitzer way, but MommyQ was hoping for Bat Mitzvah ruffles and a big wacky collar.

I know the term “design” is used rather loosely here. I’m not envisioning an episode of Project Runway where Debra and Gwyneth are running around with scissors, yelling about finishing hemlines and creases. I’m sure they just gave some input here and there. All kidding aside – the best part about this collection is it benefits a great cause, the EB Medical Research Foundation.

If you’re dying to see the rest of the Jubilee Collection, you can click here.  If you buy a regular-priced piece from this collection, you can get a FREE Lilly Pulitzer Signature Bag. Check out Neiman Marcus for details.

Luckily for me, my little dudes aren’t into this show. I’m not saying it’s bad, but I am saying it’s really creepy. I liken it to Teletubbies, which I would describe as “gently disturbing.” You can see for yourself without actually watching the show. Just visit the blog, Yo Blogga Blogga! That will give you a big old spoonful of weird.  No big deal though, the show wasn’t really created for me.

Anyway, tune in on April 3rd to see Mr. Black transform into…well, himself in an orange jumpsuit. After all, this is his son’s favorite show. See what parenthood does to you. It makes you all kooky. And that’s a good thing.

Jenn and Angelina were seated just rows apart. Who plans that, by the way? I was wondering what Jenn would’ve done had Brad won the Oscar. My money is on lots of tears. There is no way she wouldn’t have broken down over that little victory for the ex. Let’s face it, she may loathe Angelina, but I’m sure she still has a soft spot in her heart for Brad.

What cracks me up is the so-called fashion experts have declared Jennifer’s metallic gown to be more smashing that Angelina’s black dress. (Hmmm, did Jenn’s face full of fillers also outshine Angelina’s fresh face?)

I’m not sure what’s wrong with an elegant black dress. And I just love the bright green jewelry. Trust me, you’ll be seeing lots of it now.  Black with green accessories is the new black with silver accessories. I guess it’s just me who doesn’t get how Angelina’s outfit was drab. I mean, she is the gal who plays with knives. What were people expecting. Fuchsia? Aqua? Ruffles?

I’ve written about this dynamic duo before and practically received death threats for siding with Angelina. I’m just not a fan of Jenn Although I did sport the “Rachel” hair style for a number of years and that was fun. Anway, my vote is for Angelina. I like style that suits the person, not a person trying to suit a style. Sorry, Jenn. You lose again.

Amy Schalk, owner of Soigné Boutique, promises an exciting look at the incoming styles for this spring. “As far as style goes, it is really across the board,” Schalk says.

The show will reflect this diversity, with more tailored European styling of London-based Ben Sherman and more whimsical flair via L.A.’s Voom, just to name two of the designers in the show. Schalk does offer one hint on style: “The asymmetrical kind of look is still in; the one-shoulder or off-shoulder things are still very popular.”

One color that has been hot everywhere else, but hasn’t crossed over into the fashion world, is green. Another hint from Schalk: this could be the year that changes. Learn more about the event here.

And speaking of fashion…when will tights be done? My friend and I were out last week and saw a girl wearing a short green and brown dress with brown tights. They looked totally wrong and my friend exclaimed, “I can’t wait for tights to be over with!” I couldn’t agree more. What’s wrong with exposed legs? Uhm, nothing. I saw this pic of Gwyneth from the Grammy Awards and all I can say is YUCK! Why would she decide to wear those hideous silver tights, especially with open-toe heels. Sorry, they just look so stupid. The outfit would’ve been amazing had she ditched them. Too bad, Gwynny. Major fashion faux pa!

Celebrity moms like Angelina Jolie, Jennifer Lopez and Jaime Pressley are all using Tiny Tillia bath toys. From bath mitts to waterproof books and skincare items, Tiny Tillia products are people, earth and animal friendly. The family of products include endearing characters like Duncan Dog, Indie Sheep, TT Cow and many more.  It’s good clean fun – Hollywood style! Shoptilla.

Julianne is awesome because she just seems like the nice funny goofy gal-next-door who just happens to be an incredible dancer and extremely ridiculously annoyingly hands-down flat-out stunningly beautiful. She’s so likable, you’re happy for her no matter how skimpy her glittery cheesy outfit may be.

I won’t even explain why guys like her. Let’s just say, she’s cute. Anyway…

I’m sad to see her go because she brings a youthful energy to the show that is refreshing. From one Dancing with the Stars fan to Julianne, best of luck.  Look out country music, a smart blonde bomshell is headed your way!

Dress me in designer duds. My drooling babbling classmates look up to me as a fashion icon. I may be small in stature, but my sense of style is revered throughout the block and possibly the neighborhood. Play dates call for something sporty yet comfortable like this Juicy Couture Baby Velour Tracksuit. It’s only $98. I’m really fond of this Gucci Baby Sneaker for $228. I can already envision quietly taking one off while I’m in the stroller and losing it the very first time I wear it. Fun! And when it gets chilly outside, please keep my tiny feet warm in $50 Baby Erin UGG Boot – pink, of course.

When it comes to the nursery, I’d like Bratt Decor furniture because that’s what J.Lo’s twins have in their room and I’m so much better than they are. Even combined. I want the Chelsea Sleigh Bed and that’s about $1,500. But don’t worry, if there’s ever a huge winter storm and we get snowed in, I can lead us all to safety in my bed. The Discovery channel swears this will happen in the next 100 years. And don’t you dare sleep me on a normal crib mattress. I need a $999 Natural Mat, just like Halle Berry’s kid has – because it’s eco-something. Best of all, it looks like the inside of a Snackwell Cookie. Mmmm…cookies.

We all know German engineering is best. That’s why I’d like a mountain of Baby Dior Silicone Pacifiers. They’re only $45 each. I will lose one every on the hour for about three days. Then I’ll have a whole bunch to play with and then – POOF! – they’ll all disappear again. I’d love to tell you how I perform this trick, but then I’d have to kill you. Sorry. I also need quite a few Baby Dior Crown Baby Bottles – anything with a princess crest on it, you know.  It’s odd that you’re paying $45 for a plastic bottle that isn’t labeled BPA-free. It’s not even glass. Oh, I get it. Ha-ha. Those Germans crack me up.

If you must carry a diaper bag, please don’t make me cry by toting a Looney Tunes monstrosity. You may choose a Petunia Pickle Bottom Chocolate Cherry Cake Society Satchel because the name totally defines everything I love. Chocolate, cherry, cake, society and well…okay not satchel, but you get what I’m saying. This is the only bag I’d like to be seen with, especially in the mall where I might run into one of my cronies/friends/enemies, so just deal with it. Oh, it’s $325.

Let’s see where we stand, shall we? I’m just a baby so my math may be off, but it seems like your grand total is $2.1 million. Okay, now let’s discuss the thread count of my blanky…

If your baby could make a ‘Wish List’ this holiday season, what would it be?

Romijn, the gorgeous 36-year-old model/actress formerly married to Full House star, John Stamos, is expecting twins this winter with actor Jerry O’Connell. She told Page Six magazine, “I have not been without a bra this entire pregnancy. I refuse. I’m not taking any chances. I’m determined to keep the puppies up!” Poor sweet girl. Someone needs to tell this perfectly plump mom-to-be that breastfeeding, while great for the bambinos, is no friend to the breasts no matter how many miracles your Victoria’s Secret bra may perform. Get to know your new best friend, saline.

Bowen, best known for her roles on ‘Boston Legal’ and ‘Lost’ is expecting again according to People magazine. She had her first son, Oliver, in April 2007. I loved her recent guest appearance as Denise on BL last week. She’s quite the clever seductress. My advice in preparing for baby number two would be, buy a great tandem stroller (or tantrum stroller, as I call it) and prepare to meet your new mortal enemy, muffin top.

Ashlee Simpson-Wentz, Jessica Simpson’s little sis and wife to rocker Peter Wentz, is about to deliver any minute. Even as I type she could be in labor. Wow, that’s real news. The former jig-dancer would also like to make some big lifestyle changes, like becoming a vegetarian. Nope, scratch that – sorry, a Canadian?  “She’s hot all the time,” said Wentz on the Ryan Seacrest show last week. “She’s like ‘I wish I was in Canada right now.’ Our room temperature is set to, like, 34 degrees. It’s insane!” Eh?

Supermodel Niki Taylor and her NASCAR hubby, Burney Lamar, are expecting a baby in March 2009. Niki has 13-year-old twins, Jake and Hunter. Since Burney is a Nationwide driver, I can tell you a name he absolutely won’t choose for his new baby, Kyle. Here’s another one, Busch. I can also tell you they won’t be decorating the nursery with a M&M theme. Luckily for Burney, he joins Jimmy Johnson and Jeff Gordon in the elite ‘drivers with hot wives club’ without even being a Sprint Cup driver. Now that’s a victory!

MommyQ’s Hollywood baby trend predictions for 2009? The Bugaboo will reclaim its spot as the number one stroller, bumping off the outta-this-world Orbit. Blessed babes will sleep in cribs that cost more than your summer wardrobe and celeb moms will continue to dress their little fashionistas in eco-wear, like this $92 Angel sweater and designer duds like these $195 Prada toddler shoes. Not to mention, Hollywood mamas will be out & about in $238 William Rast jeans, a size 25 please, only weeks after giving birth. Making you feel like wearing this.

Cover: Nicole Ritchie looks like a 12-year-old hippie. Harlow is a cutie-pie. Cheryl Burke IS NOT fat. Seriously, she’s gorgeous. But I find it odd that her exclusive, “Dancing’s Cheryl Fights Back – Do You Really Think I’m Fat?” is located right under “Wow! Angelina’s Body (& New Tattoos!) After Babies.” So we’re trying to end the obsession with skinny while promoting being skinny? Interesting approach. And by the way, Angelina is skinny because she doesn’t eat. It’s not rocket science.

I’m not shopping at JCPenney, not matter how Polo-looking the ad might be.

Indy’s too old to be back.

Hugh Jackman with gun is yummy. George Clooney with mustache is not.

Victoria Beckham weighs less than the stapler on my desk.

Swedish Fish ad is just plain weird. Is it candy that tastes like fish? Or candy that tastes like cat?

I’m not sure what a Harajuku Girl is, but I don’t think I want to smell like one.

Toby Kebbell is scary.

I’m guessing the PussyCat Dolls sell lots of albums. Or maybe they just have lots of stalkers.

Yes We Can? Really, Obama? Can we?

George Hamilton is so very orange and he says he tans the natural way. I didn’t know sleeping in a tanning bed was natural.

Angelina and Brad…. together…. I’ll let everyone think their own thoughts on this one.

Beth Ostrosky wore a tissue disguised as a stripper costume to her wedding. How romantic.

Suze Orman with a milk mustache? See above about George Clooney with a non-milk mustache…

Paul Newman’s legacy, Hole in the Wall camp, is a great thing.

Wait, Sketchers are still in?

No matter how grown up Rick Schroder may be, he’ll always be “The Ricker” to me.

The best they could come up with for Style Watch is a cropped trench coat? A trench coat. Geez, that’s so creative. I guess if you make it short instead of long that’s news according to the fashion industry.

A dog wearing pearls…not sure what that has to do with Febreze, but whatever.

High School Musical 3 looks nothing like high school. I never got to float around in a pool in an inner tube wearing a cocktail dress. No fair!

Eva Mendez is wearing a killer pair of YSL heels. Mmmm.

The last page, Chatter, is always the best. This week’s deep question is “If you had three wishes, what would the last one be?” Blake Lively is pretty cute with her answer, “To have a hundred more.” Taylor Momsen, whoever that might be, says, “For more time at the beach – I don’t have to do anything with my hair. No styling.” Yea, that makes perfect sense.

ABC’s hit show Dancing with the Stars, may be the best guilty pleasure to ever grace a television set. Over-the-top glittery costumes boasting more sequins than an ’80s prom, combined with some seriously smokin’ hot bodies transports you into a wonderland of acceptable raunchiness and what, pray tell, is more fun than that? Think of it as a smorgasbord of decent smut with a twist of ballroom dancing.

Every season they manage to choose stars that eventually capture your heart and no matter how hard you try, you find yourself rooting for someone. Or worse yet, cheering out loud when your favorite dancer nails the Paso Doble. (And yes, you learn the names of the dances too.)

Since it’s on network TV, you can ogle everyone as much as you want and it’s totally 100% acceptable. Why? Because you’re concentrating on the steps, the footwork, the form. You care about the dance, not the ridiculously fit body pulsating and gyrating to the music. You’re (gulp) appreciating art.

And the hot bodies just keep coming out on stage, one after another. Kym. Brooke. Toni. Karina. Julianne, a little thunderbolt of heaven. People who could care less about dancing are tuning in by the millions. For example, at least once a week during my daily commute radio personality, Bobby Bones mentions DWTS because the female dancers are so incredibly hot. He admits he watches the show solely for the hottness factor. I’m sure he’s not alone.

The professional male dancers are nothing to sneeze at either. Eye candy galore! In fact, the dancers, the stars, even the hosts and the judges (like Carrie-Ann Inaba) are attractive. Might I add, the dresses and the hair pieces they find for co-host Samantha Harris are ridiculously stunning. I have no idea how she holds her head up with all of those extensions weighing her down. That’s a lotta hair…

MommyQ’s recap of last night is pretty simple. Lance Bass and his partner Lacey Schwimmer finally did something right. When the show began, I saw those horrible purple costumes and all of that manliner and thought, “Ewww, this is gonna be bad.” But I was wrong. As soon as the Rhianna song started, the costumes immediately made sense and they performed the routine perfectly. Even the oddball faces and monster-like moves worked. It’s about time! Lance is no stranger to dancing. He was in ‘N Sync, right? He performed choreographed routines for a living. I knew he could bring it if given the opportunity. (Speaking of boy bands, did their routine last night remind anyone of the “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back)” music video? Not a BB fan, but that was an awesomely bad video and seemed oddly familiar…)

Mama of four, Brooke Burke is impossible to beat right now because she’s a really good dancer. What did you think I was gonna  say? Sure, her hip-swiveling moves probably sent some folks to the hospital for heart palpitations. What’s new? Former Raider, Warren Sapp had a uneventful night, but he’s still going to the finals because he’s so charismatic and light on his feet. How can anyone that big make ballroom dancing look so easy? MommyQ thought Toni Braxton, a fan favorite, looked confused and wobbly. Not sure why the judges didn’t give her a big dose of honesty like everyone else? Hmmm.

Read ABC’s official live blog.

Especially when it comes to creating stellar commercials. Where would the HP TouchSmart be sans Joan Jett’s rockin’ hit??? The moment I heard that catchy tune, I knew exactly who and what it was. Do You Wanna Touch Me? It wasn’t Joan’s biggest hit – hard to beat I Love Rock N’ Roll – but it was great. I just HAD to see her old music video and sure enough, there it was on YouTube.  Only one word can be used to describe an ’80s music video, AWESOME! I vaguely remembered the red jumpsuit! Jumpsuits, what an invention.

Anyway, the song took me back to a decade of big hair and even bigger bangs. Incredible marketing decision on HP’s part. Sheer genius. I would’ve loved to be a fly on the wall in that concept meeting. They will rock sales figures thanks, in part, to that critical song choice.  BTW, isn’t funny to think about how scandalous that song was when it came out?! Now it’s about as shocking as …er, well….nothing, I guess.

Swatch watches. Reebok hightops with enormous scrunched-up socks. Jelly shoes. Jelly bracelets. Guess jeans with zippers and bows. The always-hilarious lasagna-eating fat cat, Garfield. Perms. Rat tails. Finally getting rid of rat tails. ESPRIT. Units. Neon socks. The Atari-wanna-be, Odyssey. (Does anyone remember that piece of low-tech crap?) Here’s to every rad child of the ’80s. Keep gagging yourself with a spoon. Like, totally!

Pregnancy is an exciting time in a non-celebrity life, so it must be extra-special when it’s a famous belly growing.  No matter who you are, if you’ve had a baby you’ve experienced the same life-changing event – a birth! That similar momentous experience makes you feel a connection to someone famous.

Let’s take, Angelina Jolie-Pitt, for instance. She had her twins via c-section so she went through everything all c-section moms did like the scary long needle in the back, the creepy tingling toes, the weird pulling and tugging sensations, the BIG final push so kindly referred to as “pressure,” meeting your baby for the first time with your organs sitting next to you on a table and the sewing-up job that seems to leave you stranded there for eternity. So yea, I could say Angelina and I have something in common. Does that makes us friends? No. But we have a distant connection. And I think most people want to feel a connection and they act on it by mimicking purchases.  Orbit, Ergo, Q Collection Junior, Bratt Decor a la J.Lo and so on….

Doesn’t mom get a secret thrill saying matter-of-factly to her friend, “I have a stroller like Tori” or “a Bumble Bag like Reese” or “a Britax like Donald Trump’s kid…” People just embrace it. It somehow makes us all even. See, we’re all special folks. Awe…

My mom, who spends a lot of time with my boys, asked me a pretty good Max and Ruby trivia question. “Where are their parents?” I thought about it for a moment and she was right, Max and Ruby’s parents are never in the show. They have a Grandma that makes many appearances, but no parents. And hardly even a mention of parents.

I did some digging and it seems the writer of the Max and Ruby books, Rosemary Wells, left out the parents for a reason. According to Wells, “As in most other classic stories, we don’t see Max and Ruby’s parents, because I believe that kids resolve their issues and conflicts differently when they are on their own. The television series gives kids a sense about how these two siblings resolve their conflicts in a humorous and entertaining way.”

Without us. The nagging, meddling parents…

Well, I have to admit, part of me is kinda excited they’re making a comeback. I’m still undecided as to whether they look cool or stupid, but there’s a goofy kid with a bad perm and big bangs looming inside me that is dying to wear a pair.  Ah, the feel of itchy wool against the outside of your calf under your jeans. Priceless.

Lindsay Lohan of all people, figured this out somehow and launched her spin on it, the “Ankle Glove.” By the way, they instantly sold-out at Fred Segal. Seriously! Now it seems you can buy them online for $42. They are animal print and -hate to say it – maybe cute too? Maybe.

Even your tiny little non-Lindsay-like princess can wear them. Baby girls will most certainly be sporting some kind of leg warmer this fall. Baberoo makes 100% certified Organic Leggies for baby girls. They can be worn up to age 5. I must admit, these are CUTE! And you can change diapers in a snap!

Has the leg warmer been slimmed down and sassed up enough to see a happy rebirth? Better yet, will you be wearing them? I will..